As a grassroots football coach, you’re in a unique position to influence not just players’ technical development, but their mental health and wellbeing. Players often spend more time with you than with any other adult outside their family, and they look to you for guidance on how to handle challenges, setbacks and success.
Building mentally resilient teams while recognising when individual players need additional support requires intentional strategies and ongoing awareness. Your approach to mental health can shape your players’ relationship with football for years to come.
Understanding Your Role in Player Mental Health
The Coach as ‘Mental Health Influencer’ (let’s become positive influencers, not the type of crap seen on social media)
You Set the Emotional Tone:
- Your reactions to mistakes, wins and losses teach players how to respond
- Your language about effort, improvement and success shapes their self-talk
- Your behaviour under pressure models coping strategies for challenging situations
- Your attitude toward opponents and officials demonstrates sportsmanship and perspective
You Create the Environment:
- Team culture reflects your values and priorities
- How you handle conflict affects players’ sense of safety and belonging
- Your communication style influences how players express themselves
- Your approach to individual differences impacts team inclusion and acceptance
You Have Unique Insight:
- You observe players in competitive and stressful situations regularly
- You see patterns in behaviour, mood and performance over time
- You understand each player’s baseline personality and typical responses
- You witness social dynamics and peer relationships within the team
Building Team Resilience
Creating a Growth Mindset Culture
Language That Builds Resilience:
- “That was a good attempt – what would you try differently next time?”
- “Mistakes are proof that you’re trying and learning.”
- “Our team gets stronger by supporting each other through challenges.”
- “Every player contributes to our success in different ways.”
- “We control our effort, attitude, and how we treat each other.”
- “Hands up if you’ve ever made a mistake on purpose.”
Language to Avoid:
- “Don’t make mistakes”, or “That was stupid.”
- “You’re letting the team down.”
- “We have to win this game.”
- “You’re not good enough” or “You can’t do that.”
- “I’m disappointed in you.” (focus on specific behaviours instead)
Pre-Season Mental Foundation
Establish Team Values:
- Involve players in creating team agreements about support, communication and behaviour no matter what the age group
- Define what success means beyond just winning games
- Create mottos or phrases that emphasise effort, learning and team unity
- Establish consequences that focus on learning rather than punishment
Build Individual Connections:
- Learn something personal about each player beyond football
- Understand (as best you can) each player’s goals, fears and motivations
- Identify each player’s preferred communication style
- Recognise different personality types and adapt your approach accordingly
Set Realistic Expectations:
- Discuss the difference between controllable and uncontrollable factors
- Emphasise process goals over outcome goals
- Prepare players for the reality that improvement includes setbacks
- Create excitement about learning and development throughout the season
During-Season Resilience Building
Training Session Strategies:
Mistake Recovery Drills:
- Practice specific situations where players must bounce back from errors
- Celebrate players who encourage teammates after mistakes
- Create scenarios where teams must overcome disadvantages
- Reward effort and positive attitude during difficult drills
Communication Development:
- Teach players how to give constructive feedback to teammates
- Practice calling for help when struggling or confused
- Develop signals or phrases for encouraging each other during matches
- Create opportunities for players to lead and support others
Pressure Preparation:
- Gradually increase pressure in training situations
- Practice taking penalties, free kicks and other high-pressure scenarios
- Simulate match conditions with noise, time pressure and stakes
- Teach calming techniques and focus strategies before implementing them under pressure
Match Day Mental Preparation:
Pre-Match Team Talks:
- Focus on process rather than results (“Let’s communicate well” vs. “We must win”)
- Acknowledge nerves as completely normal and potentially helpful
- Remind players of their individual strengths and team connections
- End with positive, specific intentions for the match
Half-Time Adjustments:
- Lead with positive observations before addressing problems
- Focus on 2-3 specific, actionable changes rather than overwhelming with information
- Address the emotional state of the team alongside tactical adjustments
- Encourage player input and leadership in problem-solving
Post-Match Processing:
- Allow immediate emotions without rushing to analysis
- Highlight effort, improvement and positive behaviours first
- Address mistakes as learning opportunities in a constructive manner
- Celebrate individual contributions that may not show up in statistics
Recognising Mental Health Warning Signs
Behavioural Changes to Monitor
Sudden Performance Changes:
- Significant decline in skills or decision-making that can’t be explained by physical factors
- Unusual risk-taking or overly cautious play that’s uncharacteristic
- Loss of competitiveness or engagement during training and matches
- Inability to concentrate or follow instructions that were previously manageable
Social and Communication Changes:
- Withdrawal from teammates or avoidance of team social interactions
- Increased conflicts or arguments with players they previously got along with
- Reluctance to communicate during play when they were previously vocal
- Changes in leadership behaviour or confidence in team settings
Emotional Regulation Difficulties:
- Extreme reactions to normal football situations (criticism, mistakes, substitutions)
- Persistent negative mood that doesn’t improve after disappointing results
- Anxiety that interferes with performance or enjoyment
- Emotional outbursts that are uncharacteristic or seem disproportionate
Physical and Energy Changes (will need PCG input here):
- Persistent fatigue that doesn’t improve with rest
- Frequent injuries or complaints of pain that don’t have clear physical causes
- Significant changes in weight, appetite or energy levels
- Sleep difficulties that affect training attendance or performance
Age-Specific Warning Signs
Youth Players (Under 12):
- Regression in emotional maturity or coping skills
- Persistent clinginess to parents or reluctance to separate
- Physical complaints before training or matches without an obvious medical cause
- Loss of enthusiasm for activities they previously enjoyed
Adolescent Players (12-16):
- Dramatic changes in friend groups or social behaviour
- Academic problems that coincide with football-related stress
- Risk-taking behaviours or mentions of self-harm
- Substance use or other concerning coping mechanisms
Adult Players (16+):
- Persistent negative self-talk or expressions of hopelessness
- Isolation from family and friends outside football
- Work or education problems related to football stress
- Mentions of football being their only source of identity or self-worth
Responding to Mental Health Concerns
Initial Response Strategies
Create Safe Opportunities for Conversation:
- Approach players privately (whilst always considering safeguarding scenarios) rather than in front of teammates
- Use open-ended questions: “How are you feeling about things lately?”
- Listen without immediately trying to solve or minimise problems
- Avoid making assumptions about what might be wrong
Express Genuine Concern:
- “I’ve noticed you seem different lately, and I wanted to check in”
- “You’re an important part of this team, and I want to make sure you’re okay”
- “Is there anything happening that I should know about to better support you?”
- “How can I help you enjoy football and feel successful here?”
Maintain Appropriate Boundaries:
- Recognise the difference between coaching support and therapeutic intervention
- Don’t attempt to diagnose or provide counselling beyond your training
- Focus on football-related support while acknowledging broader concerns
- Know when and how to refer players to appropriate professional resources
When to Escalate Concerns (always follow your club protocol here)
Immediate Safety Concerns:
- Any mention of self-harm, suicide, or harming others
- Evidence of abuse or neglect
- Severe eating disorders or dangerous weight management behaviours
- Substance abuse
Persistent Issues Affecting Function:
- Mental health concerns that significantly impact football performance for extended periods
- Problems that seem to be worsening despite your support efforts
- Issues that affect academic performance, family relationships, or other life areas
- Situations where parents seem unaware of concerning changes in their child
Professional Referral Resources:
- Club welfare officers or designated mental health contacts
- School counsellors or social workers
- Local mental health services for children and adolescents
- General practitioners who can coordinate appropriate care
- The Hub of Hope
Supporting Players Through Difficult Times
Accommodation Strategies
Training Modifications:
- Adjust expectations temporarily while maintaining inclusion
- Provide alternative roles or responsibilities that build confidence
- Create opportunities for success and positive recognition
- Modify physical demands if mental health affects energy or concentration
Communication Adaptations:
- Check in more frequently with struggling players
- Provide clear, simple instructions when concentration is affected
- Offer private/alternate feedback sessions for players who are sensitive to public criticism
- Use written communication for complex information if verbal processing is difficult
Team Integration:
- Help teammates understand how to support struggling players appropriately (whilst maintaining confidentiality)
- Create team activities that build connection and mutual support
- Address bullying or exclusion immediately and decisively
- Celebrate diverse contributions and different types of success
Building Support Networks
Connecting with Families:
- Communicate regularly with PCGs about their child’s experience
- Share observations about changes in behaviour or mood
- Collaborate on strategies that support the player both at home and in football
- Respect family privacy while ensuring appropriate support
Working with Other Professionals (often in partnership with PCGs):
- Coordinate with school staff if mental health affects academic performance
- Collaborate with healthcare providers when appropriate and with permission
- Share relevant information with club welfare officers or mental health resources
- Maintain confidentiality while ensuring adequate support
Creating Mental Health-Positive Team Culture
Team Practices That Support Wellbeing
Regular Check-Ins:
- Begin training sessions with brief emotional check-ins
- Create opportunities for players to share challenges or successes
- End sessions by acknowledging effort and positive behaviours
- Encourage players to support each other’s mental health
Stress Management Education:
- Teach breathing techniques and other coping strategies
- Discuss the importance of balance between football and other life activities
- Model healthy responses to pressure and disappointment
- Encourage players to seek help when they need it
Inclusive Environment:
- Celebrate different types of contributions beyond goals and assists
- Address discrimination or exclusion immediately
- Create opportunities for all players to experience success and leadership
- Support players through various personal challenges and life changes
Season-Long Mental Health Maintenance
Beginning of Season:
- Establish communication patterns with players and families
- Create team agreements about supporting each other’s wellbeing
- Set realistic expectations for both performance and personal development
Mid-Season Monitoring:
- Adjust training and match approaches based on stress levels and team dynamics
- Address emerging conflicts or mental health concerns promptly
- Celebrate mental health improvements alongside skill development
End of Season Reflection:
- Acknowledge personal growth and resilience shown by players
- Process disappointments and challenges in constructive ways
- Help players set goals for continued mental health and football development
- Recognise contributions to team mental health and positive culture
Remember Your Influence and Limitations
As a coach, you have tremendous influence over your players’ mental health and relationship with football. Your support, understanding, and positive modelling can make a lasting difference in their lives. However, you’re also not a mental health professional, and it’s important to recognise when players need support beyond what you can provide.
Focus on creating an environment where:
- Mental health is discussed openly and without stigma
- Players feel safe seeking help when they need it
- Effort and character are valued alongside skill and results
- Individual differences are respected and accommodated
- The joy of football is maintained even during challenging times
The resources and support provided in The Vault are designed to promote mental wellbeing and provide general guidance on mental health related to grassroots football.
However, the content is not intended to serve as specific mental health advice or replace consultation with a trained professional. If you or someone you know requires personalised mental health support, we strongly encourage you to consult with a licensed mental health professional and/or seek appropriate services in your area.
