Guest post by ADHD Coach, Graham Summerscales
Lack of awareness can push the ADHD’er to feel overwhelmed, just saying what could be perceived as a non-offending statement, can be so damaging.
Having ADHD is demanding. It takes tremendous energy to function in the workplace/school/college/university and in ‘normal’ day-to-day life. It’s essential to be mindful of your words when talking to someone about it. Specific phrases can be particularly unhelpful, or even hurtful, to someone with ADHD and it’s essential to be aware of them.
Understanding and supporting individuals with ADHD is vital for creating a positive and inclusive environment. However, a lack of awareness can lead to unintentionally damaging statements, which can cause feelings of overwhelm and distress for individuals with ADHD. This article highlights some specific phrases to avoid and raises awareness about the importance of being mindful when discussing ADHD-related challenges with coworkers.
🧠 “Just try harder.”
This phrase can be dismissive and can imply that the person with ADHD isn’t working hard enough when in reality, they may be trying their best. ADHD cannot be “tried harder” away. The simplest of tasks can be so challenging, but making reasonable adjustments can help the individual activate!
🧠 “You should be able to focus better.”
This statement implies that the person with ADHD isn’t doing enough to control their symptoms, which may be untrue. It’s important to remember that ADHD is a neurological condition and is something that needs to be supported, not necessarily it’s not something that can get fixed. Coaching the individual is proven to help generate successful outcomes.
🧠 “You need to stop being so impulsive.”
This phrase can be hurtful because it implies that the person with ADHD is making conscious decisions about their behaviour, which is often not the case. Impulsivity is a symptom of ADHD, and it’s important to remember that the person is not necessarily in control of their actions. Focus can be a challenge, working in short bursts can prove an effective way to maintain focus and prevent impulsive behaviour.
🧠 “Why can’t you just calm down?”
This phrase can be unhelpful because it implies that the person with ADHD is not trying to control their emotions when in reality, they may be doing their best. It’s important to remember that ADHD can cause intense feelings and be challenging to manage. Again, coaching support can be essential for generating effective strategies to help the individual manage their emotions.
🧠 “It’s all in your head.”
This phrase implies that the person with ADHD is making up their symptoms or exaggerating their condition, which is not true. ADHD, as I mentioned above, is a neurological condition, that can affect a person’s life in various ways, and it’s essential to take it seriously. These statements are so foolish and are generally put out there with little knowledge of the individual and the symptoms of the condition.
Having ADHD can be a challenging experience, and it’s important to be mindful of the words you use when talking to someone about it. Being aware of these challenges can help ensure that you are supportive and understanding and can help create an environment conducive to managing ADHD. Remember that ADHD is a neurological condition that cannot simply be fixed or controlled through sheer willpower.
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Graham Summerscales has 15 years experience of being an Executive Coach. In January 2022, following his own ADHD diagnosis, he embarked on a new mission as a certified ADHD Coach. By skillfully merging his extensive expertise with his personal insights, Graham now empowers business leaders and entrepreneurs to conquer their unique ADHD challenges and thrive in their working lives. Visit https://www.all-about-change.co.uk/adhd-coaching for more information.
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